I am so tired of some of my habitual reactions and thinking. Old thought, feeling and reaction patterns that I might have thought were cleared out resurface at stressful times. It might be an individual stressful time or the stress and chaos in the world that triggers my old stuff. So what old stories, thoughts and reactions are you tired of?

I am tired of being upset at the driver that is too slow, that is tailgating, that turns in front of me. I’m tired thinking my body should be different. I’m tired of thinking other people should be different. I’m tired of being fearful. I’m tired of being short with people I love. I’m tired of worrying about money. I’m tired of worrying about paying a dentist bill. I’m tired of worrying about house maintenance and how to pay for it. I’m tired of worrying! I’m tired of thinking about how someone else should take care of themselves – that’s not my path. I’m tired of getting off my own path. I’m tired of thinking I should be different, when I’m honoring my own innate, authentic rhythm. I’m tired of thinking I should get more done, have more energy, see more people, when all I want to do is rest.

Not that I think about these things all the time. As we become more aware of what we are thinking and feeling, we get more practiced at noticing and making a different choice. We tell ourselves a new or different story. Just because we have a deeply ingrained pattern doesn’t mean we can’t create a new pattern. It takes willingness, practice, trust and time . . . and great tenderness and kindness to ourselves.

As the year winds down, we come to the end of autumn and its energy of sorting out and letting go of what no longer serves us to make space for what nourishes us through the hibernation of winter. Now is a good time to lovingly reflect on 2019 and what this classroom of life presented us. Always with the utmost loving kindness, we can acknowledge what we might like to change, and choose to try a different way of acting or thinking – try a new science experiment on for size.

Just because another year has passed, doesn’t mean we should be anywhere specific on our path. The only timeline is our entire life. We have a lifetime to try different science experiments in this classroom of life, and notice what flows our good feeling and what shuts down the tap. The beauty of getting older is that we might feel more acutely the results of our unloving choices – and be more forgiving of ourselves when we realize we didn’t know how to do anything different at the time. And we make the choice yet again, for the millionth time, to align with our Higher Self, even if we can’t feel it, and come from the place of utmost Love, moment to moment.

Wishing you more Love than you can imagine, this moment and every moment.