I’ve been noticing something this year. I’ve been feeling more filled up, refreshed, replenished. I was surprised, because I thought I already was feeling pretty good. I took time off at the end of last year, I’ve been sleeping enough, doing some yoga, staying home a lot, being willing to have a better balance in life so I have more time and space to take care of loved ones and fur babies who need some tending to. This feeling of being topped off is definitely different than what I’ve felt in the past when I thought I was filled up.
I’ve been taking better loving care of myself over the last 7 years, since I was diagnosed with cancer. I keep paying attention to the four pillars of health: right rest, right movement, right nutrition, right relationship within and without. And I did rebuild and heal. So what was different now?
In all of the changes and challenges over the last year, often there was nothing I could do except say to myself, This is what is happening now. I just need to breathe. I’m asking for help, guidance, direction. I have no idea where this is headed. I’m really fearful, anxious, overwhelmed – pick one – and, this is the situation now. I surrendered, over and over and over again. The more I let go of how I wanted it to be or wished it could be, the better I felt. I didn’t do any of this perfectly. I just did the best I could in the moment.
All I could control was my response to whatever was happening. I couldn’t change health situations or another person. I could notice the overwhelm and fear. I could be aware of the (temporary) feeling of being helpless and powerless. And I could be very kind to myself. I could breathe, and surrender. In surrender, I was able to let things go that I thought were important. I used to think everything I wanted to do was a priority. Turns out, not so much! In letting go, I was able to replenish. In not holding on so tightly, the taps to the loving flow of universal life force energy opened, and my reservoir filled up.
Louise Hay says that the power is in the present moment. And the most powerful force in the Universe is Love. So in each moment that I felt afraid or overwhelmed, if I came back to the present moment with my breath, if I was willing to be kind to myself, then I could feel the Love that always surrounds me. I reminded myself I’ve always been taken care of, and I am now. All is well, no matter what it looks like. I let go into the present moment where all truly IS well. In surrender, there is peace, and replenishment.