This fall, I am deluged with stories of people breaking open. Sometimes they feel they are breaking apart, sometimes their hearts are breaking open beyond imagining. In Chinese Medicine, Fall is the time of the Metal element. We use metal to create infrastructure…and sometimes the old infrastructure has to be torn down to make way for the new. In fall, we “gather in” what we have grown during the Spring and Summer….and sort that which will serve and nourish us in the Winter to come. We let go that which is not up to snuff, that which will not nourish us during hibernation and rest. There is often grief in letting go, but letting go is necessary to make room for more good. We must create the space to allow for the receiving.
In the spirit of this letting go – and letting come – time, I would like to share a forgiving practice called Ho’oponopono as discussed by Dr. Hew Len. Forgiveness has been defined as ceasing to cherish the displeasure of someone or something…..we let go of the displeasure we are holding. More letting go, in service of letting more good come into the void created by the release.
Dr Len says: “In the ancient Hawaiian culture, whenever a member of the community fell into any kind of misfortune, whether through illness, accident, or even willful crime, the entire population sat in a circle around the person, silently searching their own hearts for how they may have contributed, even in some seemingly minor way, to the person’s suffering. Perhaps they held a judgment against this person or their family or maybe felt a secret envy or jealousy. Whatever the case, after they recognized their part and silently asked for the subject’s forgiveness, they quietly left the circle. No words were shared. In the end, when all had made their own peace, the individual sitting in the middle was healed.
As simple as this practice sounds, it works based on what we now call quantum principles – that we are all entangled or connected and therefore we cannot escape the effects of one person on the collective, or of the collective on one person. It also works on the metaphysical level……that of the One Mind asleep in the dream of suffering (our human lives). All minds, then, are joined as One.”
Dr. Len distilled this tradition of forgiveness handed down from his elders to four phrases. Think of someone or some situation that evinces a “loss of joy” however slight. Hold this subject in your mind and begin to repeat the four phrases (detailed below), directing them to this mental image. You don’t have to “feel” the connection; the feeling comes after the choice to do this. Spirit is more than eager and willing to heal this relationship – even as little as one percent of willingness from you opens the door.
You will find that when you next see this person (or are in the situation), something has changed. What has changed is that the veils of darkness between you have lifted. You are now both seeing more of your real Selves in each other. The past has melted away in the Light of Spirit that you invited into the relationship.”
Here is how we do Ho’oponopono. I invite you to join me in this loving practice.
“I love you: We are recognizing that at a deep level we are One. We are mirrors for each other. Judging or condemning you would just be doing the same to me. You, in my perception of you, are a projection of my state of mind. Loving and forgiving you is also doing the same for me. The divisions between us are only in our imaginations. Although bodies and actions appear separate, the Mind that is expressing through all of us is the same. All behavior is either an expression of or a call for Love. So Love is the cause of everything, and the cure at the same time.
I am sorry: Not for anything in particular that you or I have done – that would make the offense real – but for together having decided to experience separation, and for all the suffering of all of us as a result of this mutual decision. For that I am truly sorry. And I am sorry for my contribution in this way to your particular experience of suffering, confident that in our awakening and acceptance of forgiveness, we shall ultimately see all suffering washed away in an instant of healing and liberation.
Please forgive me: Not for what it appears I have done, but for agreeing with you to create this dream of suffering and separation. Please see me as an undiluted, invulnerable, eternal, and forever joyful Spirit, as I now choose to see you. I see you as Spirit who through the majesty of your own creativity and freedom has created this opportunity to awaken and remember Love, and I trust you to love me and forgive me my illusions.
Thank you: For giving us both an opportunity to heal our relationship, to heal in my mind any misperception of you as less than Divine, knowing this healing goes out to the One Mind and affects everyone and everything in Creation beyond what we can imagine. Thank you for joining with me as One Mind and healing together.
With this level of understanding simply repeat the four phrases with your subject in mind until you feel a shift or inner lightness around the relationship. That is all. Dr. Len has now condensed this practice to simply: I love you; thank you.”
This Thanksgiving time is a good time to say: I love you; thank you.